Funny Jokes 2

1.
What did the Pacific Ocean say to the Indian Ocean?
Nothing, they just waved.

2.
Knock knock
Who's there?
Icy
Icy who?
Icy your underwear.

3.
What did the blind boy say when his friend said "Look under there"?
Under where?

4.
When does B come after U?
When you take some of its honey.

Funny Jokes 1

1.
 There were three cats on a boat, one jumped off, how many were left?
None, they were all copycats.

2.
 Three people were trying to get to Disney Land.
There saw a sign that read " Disney Land left". So they went back home.

3.
Knock knock
Who's there?
Red
Red who?
Knock knock
Who's there?
Red
Red who?
Knock knock
Who's there?
Red
Red who?
Knock Knock
Who's there?
Orange who?
Orange you glad I didn't say red again.

4.
Knock Knock
Who's there?
Tank
Tank who?
You're welcome.

5.
Knock knock
Who's there?
Arch
Arch who?
Bless you.

6.
How do you confuse a fool?
Put him in a round room and tell him to sit in the corner.

7.
Knock knock
Who's there?
Robin
Robin who?
Robin you! So give me your cash!

8.
What do you call a blind dinosaur?
Do-Ya-Think-He-Saw-Us

9.
What do you call a sleepy dinosaur?
 Brontosnorus 

10.
Why did the surfer stop surfing?
Because the sea weed! 

Knock Knock Jokes!!!

1. Knock knock 
   Who's There?
    Doctor
       Doctor who?
   How did you know my name?

2. Knock Knock 
    Who's there?
    Al
    Al who? 
    Alligator

Birthday Party

On the 21 November it was my brother's birthday. In the morning when it was 7:00, I made a letter and gave him a hug.

My dad and mum gave him two chocolates and an Xbox 360 game which was Need For Speed Shift. I gave the Xbox 360 and I already have the Xbox 360 controller which I got for my birthday which was earlier on the 5th of January.

The Birthday cake was a chocolate cake with a piano and a man playing it. Also a girl was sitting on top of the piano.

We were allowed to play until dinner time. I played Blur with my brother on his laptop. My dad and mum played Toca Race Driver on the Play Station 2 (PS2).

The birthday was fun and we also got to pop the party poppers. We also started playing on the Xbox 360 and started playing Need For Speed Shift. And that was how we spent the day.

Referee Joke

Q. What is the referee's favourite drink?

A. Penal Tea

Dictionary Jokes

1. Q. What do you call a dictionary that is creative?
   A. A detective.


2. Q.What do dictionaries do when they get a job?
    A. Dictate

FUNNY JOKE!!!!!!!

Q. What do you call an alligator in a vest? 

A. An investigator

Having Dinner With Fang Fang

One night Fang Fang invited me to dinner at her grandmother's house. She called her grandmother Nai Nai. Her cousins Ling May and Ling Sun came as well. We had wontons, great big ones, Fang Fang's favourite. It was her favourite because she found a green jade cat in a great big wonton before. She still has that jade cat and wears it on a string around her neck. I needed a massive bowl that could hold such a big wonton that could hold green jade cats, and I used chopsticks to eat the wonton. Fang Fang's grandmother made them especially because Fang Fang thought that it would be good to let me have a taste of her very favourite food. Fang Fang used to not be able to eat using chopsticks, but now she is so good that she taught me how to use them. I used to not be able to eat with them either, but with her help I feel like I grew up in china. Then it was time to go home. I said thank you to Fang Fang and her Nai Nai. I had lots of fun with them. I wanted to have dinner with them again.

Seagram Building and Structures

Seagram Building, New York
Seagram Building is the first modern high-rise building in New York. It is 160 metres tall and has 38 floors.

Structures

CN Tower, Toronto, Canada

CN Tower is the tallest structure in the Western Hemisphere at 553 metres and 147 floors.

Sydney Tower, Sydney, Australia

Sydney Tower is the 2nd tallest structure in Australia and is the tallest in Sydney at 309 metres and 19 floors.

Space Needle Tower, Seattle, Washington

The Space Needle Tower is the tallest structure in Seattle and Washington. It has 6 floors and is 184 metres. It is in a Windows 8 lock screen.

About Buildings

1. Freedom Tower, New York

 Freedom Tower has two buildings. It has 104 floors and is 541.3 meters tall. The Freedom Tower is the tallest building in the western hemisphere and in New York.

                                

                                                    Freedom Tower

                                                                                                 

2. Chifley Tower, Sydney

Chifley Tower is the 3rd tallest building in Australia and 2nd tallest building in Sydney. It has 50 floors and is 244 metres tall.   

                                           Chifley Tower      

3. Burj Khalifa, Dubai

 Burj Khalifa means Khalifa's Tower in Arabic. It remains the tallest building in the world, but there are three proposed buildings, Kingdom Tower, Sky city, and Nakheel Tower which are all going to be around 1000 meters tall. Burj Khalifa is 830 meters tall and has 160 floors.

                                                                  Burj Khalifa

4. Petronas Towers, Kuala Lumpur

The Petronas Towers are twin towers. It is the tallest building in Kuala Lumpur at 452 meters.

                                        Petronas Towers

5. World Trade Centre, New York

The World Trade Centre twin towers were the tallest buildings in New York and got destroyed by terrorists in 2001. 

                                       World Trade Centre

  6. Shanghai Tower, Shanghai

     Shanghai Tower is the tallest building in Shanghai. It is 632 meters and has 128 floors and it is still under construction.

                                   Shanghai Tower

                                     

Jokes

1.
    Q. What animal makes the most fouls?
    A. A chicken.

2.
    Q.There was someone that tripped over but             where did the person trip over?
    A. A trip over Mount Everest.

3.
    Q.If a duck steps on plastic what will happen to       it?
    A. He will quack it.

A Camping Adventure

Jake and Thomas went on a big camping trip. They packed their little bags and started camping quickly to build a tent. They knew they needed to wear sunglasses before it became too sunny so they wore sunglasses. 

For a snack they decided to make pizzas on a fire and cook up a can of Baked Beans. As it got dark outside, Thomas heard a wolf make a sound in the woods! Jake was scared and stuck a stick! Outside  Thomas took a torch from inside the tent.The wolf was gone but not before howling over all the big mountains! When the morning came, Jake and Thomas left to go walking up a big hill and gather their things. It truly was an excellent camping trip.

A Trip to the Beach

One day Feleti and Billy-Sean decided to take a trip to the beach. Feleti packed a full of big burgers and a big jug of apple juice. Billy -Sean brought a towel that had a picture of a fat monkey on it. The beach was crowded but there were a few little spots left. Feleti and Billy-Sean wanted to learn how swim so they rented a pair of flippers and hopped into the water. Soon it was time for more snacks so Feleti went to a stand to buy fish and chips. A lifeguard blew on his whistle because someone was swimming too far into the ocean. The sun was making the beach hot so Feleti and Billy-Sean rubbed sunscreen on each other for protection. Eventually the tide came too close and made all the people away from the beach. Feleti and Billy-Sean packed their bag and went home.

The Dinosaur and the Girl in a Race

Once upon a time, there was a girl called Lilly Pad. She has a pet dinosaur and his name was MacDonald because she loves eating foods and drinks from MacDonalds. She lives in an Apartment on the top floor in a forest in Samsung Land.

She took MacDonald out into the forest and started a race. Lilly shouted"3, 2, 1, Go!!!!!!!!!!!!". And the race started. When the race started Lilly was in the lead. Then Lilly won the 1st lap and raced back home and then MacDonald won the 2nd lap and it was a Draw!                 This picture was when they were racing in the 1st lap.

Real Sport Joke

(Q) In soccer, what is the best way to get a goal?
(A) By putting a sock on the goalkeeper's head.

An Unusual Picnic

An unusual picnic means having a fake picnic.We make an unusual picnic in different ways ( eg. Having the wrong kind of food or drink for a picnic or make food and drinks using some coloured paper).

Instead of going to a real usual picnic,an unusual picnic can be made with paper. I think for some kids, unusual picnics will be liked by them, but many adults don't like it because they wouldn't like to be seen as silly, and would rather do a real kind of picnic.

OK readers,my choice is a real picnic because we enjoy the food more. What would you like, real picnic/ unusual picnic? 


                          Here is a picture of an unusual picnic made with paper

Sunday Funday

On Sunday, I went to Newcastle with my family. We woke up at 6:30 and left at 7:40. Newcastle is a small and old city. 

We took two trains to get there. The first train took us to Strathfield, which was a short trip. The second train took us all the way to Newcastle. It took us 3 hours to get there. I played on my brother's PSP. I played Fifa 11, Midnight Club Remix, Burnout Dominator, and Flat-out Head-on. It was so much fun!

The first thing we did was to get under a tree, then we put some sun lotion and ate mint chocolate. We went to Subway and we all ate a foot long subway. Four subways costs $36 and one subway costs $9. We also walked around and found a bridge. We went up the stairs and I took pictures of what it looks like when you look down. We also went to the beach. I played with the sand and played in the waves with my dad. 


Then we went to the walkway. My dad and I went to see a boat which was in the second floor.

My dad and I were looking at the rocks and while was looking at them, I saw a big wave come in front of me but my dad was not looking at it because he didn't see the wave.

We also walked on a place where the rocks were and also where the big waves were. That place was in the beach and we went there after we did all the events in the beach.

We also went to the park and saw an anchor. Then we went back home at evening. But when we got on our first train, it became night. In that train, I again played games on my brother's PSP.

But on the next train, i didn't, because Ashfield was the first. 

Then finally, we all got home.

Invisible Me

Once upon a time there was a boy called Tom. He lives in a tall building. He lives on the very top floor. He lives with his mum, dad and his little brother George.


Tom and George like playing games together.They play with toys, video games and running games. They have lots of fun playing together.

Then it was night."Good night." said mum.
"Good night." said Tom. "Good night." said George.

When it was morning, Tom felt a bit funny. He looked at the mirror, and he couldn't see himself. He went to mum.

 "MUM! can you see me?" exclaimed Tom.

"Where are you Tom?" mum asked. 

"Behind you!" he replied, worried.

"Oh NO! I can't see you!" exclaimed mum. Tom ran to dad.

"Can you see me?" asked Tom

"Who is that? What do you want?" dad whirls around holding a chainsaw.

"DAD, IT'S ME! TOM!" Tom shouted, afraid of the sharp spinning blades.

"Tom? Where are you? I can't see you!"

Tom almost fainted. He ran to George.

"Can you see me?" asked Tom. 

George's mouth fell open.

"GHOOOST!!!!!" he cried, and ran away.

"OH NO! So I AM invisible!" exclaimed Tom. "Well, it's not that bad because now I have invisibility, I can become a superhero!" 

" All the bad guys won't see me and I will be capable of beating them up very easily. But I still want to be myself." 

"I can't even take things but I can hit them," said Tom. Once he met the Three Stooges.

"They can help me," said Tom, "Hey, Moe can you give me back my old life where everyone can see me?"

"Who was that?" Moe looked at Curly, "why you good-for-nothing numbskull you! That horn I took in the ear's making me hear things!"

Moe tried punching him. His fist bounced off Curly's head and hit Tom in the gut, hard. 

"Ey, who's this guy?" Moe was staring right at Tom.

"You can see me?"

"Of course I can see you, what do you think I am, blind?"

"Maybe..."

"Why you..."

Tom dodged Moe's angry fists and ran away, visible again. He lived happily ever after.

Lost in the Snow

Once upon a time there was man called Edd. Edd lives in the snow in  New Zealand. He live with his dogs. He also lives with his wife called Lydia. Edd and Lydia are going on a trip. They packed up ready to go out.

Once they got out, they saw snowy trees and snowy mountains. Edd found a tent. They went in. They met Matt and Amanda in the tent.

Matt and Amanda introduced some hot food for Edd and Lydia.

 This was when Matt and Amanda were grown ups. Matt was 24 years old and Amanda was 23 years old. Matt, Edd, Amanda and Lydia had lots of fun.

Everyone played snowball fights. Matt and Edd built a big snowball. Amanda and Lydia built a big snowman as a shield and they built snowballs to try stopping the big snowball.

Suddenly, the snow became heavier and heavier.Matt."I think it's a snow storm!"exclaimed Matt. They ran as fast as they could to get to the tent." My dogs! I forgot about my dogs! exclaimed Edd. 

"Matt! My dogs have gone missing!" exclaimed Edd. "M...M..Missing!" exclaimed Matt.

"Amanda! Edd's dogs have gone missing!"exclaimed Matt.

Everyone! Lets get out of here and find Edd's dogs that have gone missing! Exclaimed Amanda.

They got out and looked everywhere but didn't find Edd's dogs.

"I think the dogs are stuck in the snow."

 The dogs were also trying to find Edd and Lydia but they did not find them. 

Until Edd had an idea.

"I know, we've not looked under the snow," So Edd took a shovel from the tent. Then they found the dogs. Then the dogs licked Edd and Lydia. "Anyway, at least I've got my dogs back, they cost me like $200," said Edd.

And they lived happily ever after.

The Magic Carpet

Once upon a time there was a boy named Matt. Matt's full name was Christopher Matt Tom. Matt lives in a country called U.S.B. U.S.B stands for "United States of Bolivia." Matt went out to for a walk. He lives with a girl. Her name was Amanda. they walked together until they found a very tall tree. They saw a carpet. They tried to climb up the tree, but they keep falling down. They tried shooting the carpet, but the bullet kept going through the carpet.


They tried almost everything.
Until Matt got an idea. "I know! I can go to my house & get a ladder." said Matt. "yeah! that's a great idea." said Amanda.

Matt went to his house & went to a  work room where he had all his tools. He went back to the tree then put the ladder on the ground.

Matt climbed up the ladder & pulled the carpet down. Matt got pulled of the ladder by the carpet. OH NO!! screamed Amanda. She pulled his legs & climbed on to the carpet.They sat on the carpet. "I know what kind of carpet this is. If it's not an ordinary carpet. It's a magic carpet."said Matt. Amanda sighed. "How do we control it?" asked Amanda."We can't. It's magic, it moves by itself but you can tell it what direction you want it to go to."

"Phew!" said Amanda. "does that mean we can go home?"she asked. "Yep" replied Matt. "Wait, how did you get all of that information." asked Amanda. " My friend told me all of that, he's a scientist."said Matt."OK" said Amanda. "At least we can go home though." said Amanda. So they controlled the magic carpet to go home & they lived happily ever after.

Joke

(Q) What has 13 eyes, 700 legs, 5 heads & 10 noses?

(A) Very ugly centipede that looks wrong.

Should Animals Be Kept in Zoos?

People have different views about keeping animals in zoos.

To begin with, people will want to see some animals that they always wanted to see.
In addition, people might have not seen the animal for a long time so they can go to the zoo and look at them.
Finally, some people might want to feed the animals in the zoo or watch a bird show.

But on the other hand, I also think animals shouldn't be kept in zoos because they will rather like at home in the wild than in the zoo like humans wouldn't like to be in jail, they would rather like to at home with their family because they can miss each other and they can be sad.

In conclusion, I am inclined to support neither of these
views completely.

Should The Canteen Sell Junk Food?

I believe the canteen shouldn't sell junk food.
To begin with, people will get too sick.
In addition, some people can be allergic to junk  food but still wanted it.
Finally, it won't be fair for the people that are allergic to junk food but not allergic to healthy food.
I strongly believe that the canteen shouldn't sell junk food.

sport joke

"How many pairs of pants are you wearing?" asked Tom.

"FORE!" yelled Bobby.

Life of Yaan

Hi Everyone!

This blog is about my adventures, interests and lots of other things I care about. I will write my stories, jokes, and things I do here, so that you can all enjoy reading them. Thanks